Resilience isn’t something you either have or don’t have—it’s something you build, one conversation at a time. Here are 5 powerful ways communication and interactions can help you rise, adapt, and find strength during life’s hardest moments
When Whitney first heard the words “You have metastatic breast cancer,” her world spun off its axis. It was a few days after Christmas—a time usually filled with warmth and laughter—but instead, she was in and out of different hospitals, searching for answers.
Yet, amid the chaos of her cancer journey, Whitney unknowingly began to cultivate resilience through communication—hinged on a framework called Communication Theory of Resilience (CTR). This framework was developed in 2010 by Patrice Buzzanell, a Professor in Communication. According to Professor Buzzanell, resilience is not something people are born with. Rather, resilience can be developed while we communicate and interact with other people when we face adversity. The framework explains how people communicate their way through hardships, relationships, and hope, through five communicative processes.
The processes are: 1) Crafting Normalcy, 2) Affirming Identity Anchors, 3) Maintaining and Using Communication Networks, 4) Constructing Alternative Logic and 5) Foregrounding Productive Action while Backgrounding Negative Feelings. Hearing these processes for the first time may seem complicated, but they are very simple and something we practice in our lives unknowingly.
Whitney’s journey is a living reflection of these five processes — each one revealing how resilience isn’t just something we have, but something we develop through interactions. Let’s digest each process:
- Crafting Normalcy
This process refers to finding ways to live life as normally as possible after adversity (like a serious sickness or major loss). You can do this by re-establishing routines or creating new habits that restore a sense of stability. For Whitney, she did this by rebuilding life piece by piece to feel normal again. While she maintained some positive old habits, she also created new ones. For instance, she began meeting monthly with friends who had also been affected by cancer at a local coffee shop. She also offered her time at Cancer Services, making awareness ribbons and supporting others—small acts that helped life feel steady and meaningful again.
Crafting normalcy could be cultivated by keeping or rebuilding your simple daily routines such as regular exercises or reading interesting books that offer comfort and predictability. Even small, consistent actions like taking a daily walk or shared meals could help your life feel grounded again. Over time, these ordinary habits create a sense of stability that increases resilience in trying times.
- Affirming Identity Anchors
This simply means holding on to who you are as a way of building resilience. A cancer diagnosis can make one question self-identity and purpose. Before Whitney was diagnosed with cancer, she was many things; a teacher, a banker, a daughter, a very kind person, and an independent young lady. But suddenly, she became a patient — dependent on doctors, family and friends.
For a while, Whitney felt cancer had swallowed her identity, but volunteering changed that. She explained, “It’s been good to be able to have volunteer opportunities because it allows me to touch lives.”
This is the enactment of Affirming Identity Anchors. Whitney rediscovered and affirmed her identity by offering kindness to others through volunteering and educating others about lessons learned in her cancer journey.
Affirming identity anchors could be developed by maintaining your connection to the roles, values and strengths that identifies you as either a parent, a painter, a passionate lover, a faithful friend or a mentor. Participating in activities that reflect these identities, even in tiny ways, help you maintain a sense of purpose in challenging seasons. When you continue doing things that remind you of who you are, resilience grows almost naturally.
- Maintaining and Using Communication Networks
This process develops resilience by finding support in connection—coworkers, support group members, family etc. And for Whitney, communication was her lifeline. When the toll of treatment weighed on her, she moved in with her parents for care and support. She later joined Cancer Services’ support group for young adults—expanding and utilizing her communication networks. As a young adult herself, she discovered a space made for people who understand her situation. “I do not have to explain things; they just get it.” By sharing and listening, Whitney built and maintained communication networks that helped her manage both emotional and practical challenges. Her openness to connection allowed her to build resilience not as an individual act, but as a shared process.
Maintaining your communication network strengthens resilience by ensuring you do not face adversity in isolation. Reaching out to trusted people, joining community groups or even connecting online can provide emotional comfort and resources. The simple act of staying connected creates a network of support that enables you to overcome adversity.
- Putting Alternative Logic to Work:
This process builds resilience by developing new ways of thinking about and meeting one’s needs. Before cancer, Whitney’s idea of strength was more inclined to productivity and independence. After her diagnosis, that logic no longer fits. She had to redefine strength as accepting help, helping others, resting when needed, and finding peace in slower days. “Letting others help is a kind of strength too,” she maintained.
Putting alternative logic to work can foster resilience by stepping outside of rigid coping ideas. You are better able to adjust to adversity when you reframe problems in new ways such as seeing rest as productive and asking for help as courageous. As you give yourself permission to think differently, you will discover new strengths and solutions that support resilience building.
- Foregrounding positive action and backgrounding negative emotions:
This final process involves building resilience by acknowledging you have the right to feel the pain and frustration of adversity but choosing instead to focus on ways that highlight positivity. Whitney recognizes dwelling on her struggles would be counterproductive and so refocuses her strength on activities such as attending health fairs and speaking with attendees about Cancer Services offerings—transforming her experience into purposeful action.
Foregrounding positive activity can help you cope with adversity by turning overwhelming feelings into productive action. Small steps like helping others or participating in fulfilling activities can reduce the power of negative emotions. This approach does not require you to ignore difficult feelings. Rather, it encourages you to place those feelings in the background while highlighting behaviors that give you a sense of direction, control and hope.
In conclusion, Whitney’s resilience building illustrates what communication scholars emphasize: resilience is not a trait but a communicative process. Her experience embodies how the Communication Theory of Resilience unfolds in real life—through everyday chats, small choices, and compassionate connections. If you are ever faced with adversity, remember that resilience is not just a trait. It can be cultivated through meaningful interactions, helping to overcome difficulties.
By Anastasia Abraham
ewurannie@gmail.com
